Monday, December 19, 2005
Blog Blog Blog...Blog till ya Die...OOOPS! NO cursing myself!
Yea...i back to blog again...todays a rather boring day...nothing much nice happen today. Stoning infront of the com loking for inspiration...No motivation to werk on new stff...just listening to my gd old songs and just vanish...vanish into oblivion...my existance at home is totaly nonsensical today...everything tats up my mind is a pile of Junk...waiting to be removed.
Anyway...the afternoons was bad enuff...moody moody very moody...No body nice to talk to...my jap friend Remy is not around...out to prctice i suppose...he's a cool dude...once from US he came down to jam with us and boy was he a inspiration...he's just lke mahmud...though on skills they're a whole lot different...
so there i was...sitting in front of the com...nothing better to do...so msg esther to see watsup...she didn't check her hp for messages at 1st...cause charging mah...ok...totally understandable...she's out i'm in...i wanna practice to occupy my time, to improve and to cast away the thought of my feelings...but no one is there to accompany me...i grief right inside of me for being like tat...
i guess i'm just a loner...since back then in times of loneliness tat i will head for the mall alone and watch a movie or maybe just window shop or shop alone...i didn't really care wat people think of me...i just do wat i do...friends were just mere importance to me...but now its so much different...i met a bunch of very nice people...make new friends...and being alone has become a fear...
soon after Esther got online...i just say to her the way i feel...its now or never...cause i can't bottom up thoughts like this...such things have no right timing...u jjust say wat u wanna say and thats it...case close...me bloody mood was cheered up by her...she werk wonders too. how fairy like...hah
thereafter...i went to clear my room...occupying myself helps me forget things...and soon after tat...went for a treat to ake myself happy...ice cream make me happy..and i did have it...bought like a small tub of ben and jerrys cookie dough...ate it right below my block...home is starting to stink...i need sum space...Boy was it gd and it did cheer me up alittle...but all the effort have to go to esther...funny...and i was wondering why her.
hmmm...nothing much happen at night...just chat chat chat...crap crap crap...till sumone went to bed....hmm...the day was not bed thanks to ben and jerry and esther...gonna label them heros...hah!
Gd Nite world...SLP like U nvr SLP B4!
--you're --
10:49 AM
10:49 AM
